Zim and the horrible human stink girl
by CherryCoke137
Summary: In order to make new friends, you need to make enemies. In order to achieve, you must deceive. You only have one life; don't waste it... even if it means hurting someone else. It'll work out in the end, right? You couldn't possibly be a victim in your own story, right? After all... it was your own decision.
1. Chapter 1

Hi! This story will be told from multiple POVs so that I won't just focus on my OC. I hope you'll like this story. You'll live, you'll laugh, (you might even get a muffin or two), and then you'll PUKE YOUR EYES OUT! THERE'S SO MANY MUSHY HUMAN EMOTION FEELINGS! *Ahem* Well, I hope I didn't scare you away. If I did, I'll give you a cupcake. Back to the story!

Disclaimer: Invader Zim doesn't belong to me. It belongs to Jhonen Vasquez.

Chapter 1:

"Do I _really_ haveto go to school? I mean, they teach the same stuff every day! Plus, it's super boring." I tried to argue with myself as I walked to school, stepping on the leaves. I had just moved here with my family last week, and I had of unpacking to do. I'd rather stay at home, anyway; this town is crazy. A creepy clown lady with chicken in her hair called me a freak, some kid had stitches on his pink, enlarged eyeball, and the news stated that someone was throwing ''rabid vermin'' things inside people's houses. On the bright side, I could make some new friends at school, and I've never had many friends before. It's my favorite season, and I have on my favorite outfit: A dark blue dress, black leggings, and black boots. At my last school, I had to wear dress code.

I looked both ways before I crossed the street. On one side, there was that smelly chicken place; on the other side, a police officer was pinning a boy down on the hood of a car. Wait, what?

"I'll teach you for standing around, doing nothing!" He yelled.

Does he mean that the boy was loitering?

I would usually stay and see what was going on, but I'm almost late for school. Besides, I didn't want to get arrested for doing nothing.

The further I walked, the more I could see the building. I only had to cross the street one more time and I would be there on time. I pressed the cross signal button thingy. Although I didn't really see any cars, I didn't know anything about the traffic law. Before I could cross, I saw a creepy Chihuahua on the other side. As I crossed, I tried not to look at it. I wasn't afraid of dogs, but that's unnatural.

I sighed. I need to stop being weird and paranoid. "Uh… hi, little puppy; how are y-"As if it was a hologram, it somehow glitches without moving… or even blinking.

"Oh, God!" I said in horror, disgust, fear, or even all of the above. I ran away as fast as I could before- *Bam!*

"Hey, look! The new girl ran into that pole!" I opened my eyes. All I could hear was laughter. I sighed, getting off the ground. "This is why I hate children." I muttered. I dusted myself off before picking up my blue book bag. Obviously, today wasn't going to go well.

"Come on, Dani; Go in the classroom like you practiced. Of course, this wasn't how I would expect my first day to go, but, you'll hang in there! Who knows? Maybe I'll make some friends right away."

"That girl is talking to herself in the hallway! She's crazy!" A girl with purple hair shouted.

"That is correct, Zita. You get an ''A''."

"What?" I sighed in despair. I turned to see the whole class standing there.

"Now, move out of the way, child! I have to unlock the door!" The teacher said. I stepped out of the way. If I can't get another student to be my friend, maybe the teacher and I could be friends!

"Hello, Ms. Bitters! Remember when you talked to my parents the other day?"

She turned around to look at me. "Yes, I remember your parents, Dani. They're NOTHING!"

I jumped as she said this. "W-what are you-"

When she opened the door, I was nearly trampled by other students.

I walked into class last, sitting next to a boy with weird hair and glasses. I don't think he's laughed at me yet, nor do I think he would. He just looks like a regular nerd.

"Today, you will learn about Space, and why it is full of Doom."

I raised my hand. "What is it, Dani?" Ms. Bitters asked.

"Space isn't full of Doom. I don't know if Space is exactly ''full'', but it's not a terrifying place. Well… some things are, but not _all_ of them."

"Well, Dani, if you think that Space is so wonderful, **then you will write a 4,000 word essay on it**! If not, then **be quiet**!"

"Yes, Ms. Bitters." I tried not to cry.

"Don't worry; she's always like that." The boy next to me says.

"Really?"

"Well, I get yelled at the most, but she's mean to everyone. As a matter of fact, everyone is."

"That sucks. Why are the mean to you?"

"They think I'm crazy because- look, here he comes, now!" He pointed at the door.

"Well, when you say thing like that-"

When the door slammed open, a green kid walked in, handing the teacher a late pass.

"Why is he green!?"

"Why? Because he's an _Alien_!"

I gasped. "Really!? That's so cool!"

"Silence, you filthy rat monkeys! It's a skin condition." He yelled.

The boy with glasses jumped from his seat, onto the desk.

"You don't have any ears!"

"That is part of the condition, disgusting grease monkey!"

"Oh, come on! That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard!"

"Maybe it's a rare skin condition." I said sarcastically.

"Yes! It is! I have a rare skin condition."

"I didn't mean-"

"Yeah, Dib; Why don't you leave him alone already?" A girl shouted.

"I wasn't-"

"Dib, what did I tell you about picking on other students? Get in the back of the class."

I gave him an apologetic look, but I don't think he saw it.

"Fine." He said, defeated.

"Now, open your books to page 1,000, where you will learn-"

I looked over at the green boy. The smug look on his face was slightly off-putting. If he _is_ an Alien, why is he here? Is he even truly evil? Does everyone ignore the fact that he's an Alien, or are they just that stupid?

One thing is for sure: I HATE this class!

*Waves* I hope you liked this chapter! The whole story is pretty much planned out, so if you didn't like this chapter, it'll get a lot better than this, I promise. When I finish this story, I might make this into a comic on DeviantArt when my scanner thing is set up.


	2. Chapter 2

HI! : 3. I actually wanted to write this chapter earlier, but since I have a lot of ideas in my mind that I can't use, (sadly for me), I've decided to suck it up and go along with it as I write. Every single thing could be different, but it's already been established. : ). Also, as I said before, this story will have multiple POVs.

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. The show belongs to Jhonen Vazquez.

Dib's POV:

I can't believe I got sent to the back of the class, just for trying to expose that monster. On the bright side, I've finally found someone who believes me. Maybe if I ask her, she'll want to be my partner. She'll have to be second in command, though. Well, behind Gaz. All I have to do is ask her… but what if she's no different from everyone else who pretended to believe me? …. I guess it couldn't hurt to ask.

"Psst! Psst! New girl! Psst! Hey!"

She didn't even turn around. I have to find another way to get her attention. I grabbed a piece of paper from under the desk. Luckily, I had my special pen with me. Let's see… what exactly should I write? Ooh, I know!

After I had written a thoroughly convincing note, I folded it into an airplane. "I hope this works."

I threw it in her direction, and with the help of my aiming skills, it had hit her head.

"Ouch!" I guess my skills are a little too advanced. After she had picked up the note, she rubbed the back of her head.

"Oh, it's a note!" I could barely hear her say. "Let's see here…" She said, unfolding the plane.

"Dani! Throw that piece of trash away and pay attention! This lesson will be on your final test."

"Yes, Ms. Bitters." She stood up and walked to the trash can by the door.

"I wouldn't normally care if you children failed or not, but the less children to pass means the less I get paid."

"That's awful. I'm sorry to hear such a thing."

"And that is why I'm teaching you children that the worst thing you can do on this planet is live on it."

Zim raised his hand.

"What is it, Zim?"

"So, if there was a hypothetical device that somehow sucked the life force out of all humans, what would it take for it to work?"

"There already_ is_ something that works that way. It's called having a job."

"…Is it normal for the first day of school to be the most depressing day of my life?"

He laughed. "Of course it is, you stupid, naïve human! What else would it be?"

"I don't know. In my old school-"

"I don't care!"

"How dare you interrupt me!"

Ms. Bitters growled. "Go to lunch! The less I have to deal with this, the better.

"But he started it!"

"Dani, this is the first and last warning I'm giving you. The next step is detention."

"Yes, Ms. Bitters." She sighed, walking out the door.

"Get out of my way, pig girl. I am trying to get to lunch."

She turned around, still standing in the doorway.

"You know, my dear, you _could _say 'excuse me'. I'm sure it wouldn't kill you."  
"Silence you cow!" He yelled, pushing her out of his way.

Her right eye twitched. "You little-! "

I grabbed her shoulders, holding her back.

"Wait a sec. I need to talk to you."

"Who-? Oh, you're the one who wrote the note!" She smiled as I let her go. "Uh… 'Dib', isn't it?"

She extended her hand. "I'm Dani."

I shook her hand.

She raised an eyebrow.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Your hands are a little tense."

"Oh, sorry," I quickly placed my hands inside my pockets. "I'm just new to making friends."

"…"

"Jeez; why did I just say that!?" I said, slapping my forehead.

"Don't worry about it." She said, waving her hand. "I know what you meant."

"Oh." I could see her as a pretty good partner, so far. I assume she believes me about Zim being an alien, so that's a step in the right direction.

"So, can you show me where the cafeteria is? I would go exploring, but I don't want to get in trouble again."

"Just follow me. I still have to ask you some things." I started walking. She followed close behind me, looking around the hallway.

Dani's POV:

When we got to the cafeteria, I noticed a bunch of students standing in line to get their lunches. Luckily, I didn't have to. I had already had my lunch inside my book bag.

"Are you getting in line?" He asked me.

"No, I-"

"Great!" He grabbed my arm and started dragging me to a table. "We can get through this a lot faster."

"What are you-"

"Sit here." He pointed to a seat next to a girl with purple hair. It didn't seem like she was going to say anything to us, being more focused on the video game she played.

"Hi!" I smiled at her.

"…"

"…"

"…Hi." She said, still playing the game.

"So… what are you playing?"

"Dib, if your friend keeps me from beating level 65, I'm going to rip your arms off and make you eat them."

"Why would you do that to me?"

"Because you're the one that brought her over here."

"Just hold on. I'm almost finished."

"What are you doing?"

"I just need to put the batteries in... and… there! Turn around, Dani."

I turned to face to table. "Okay, but-"  
He was standing on the table in front of me, waving a mini flashlight in my face.

"Do you believe in ghosts?" He asked.

"Yeah, I guess." I shrugged.

"What about Bigfoot?"

"Not entirely, but I-."

"What about aliens?"

"Yes, I do! In fact, I have a book that explains a lot of things about aliens."

"Do you have it with you?"

"It's always in my book bag with me. It talks about alien civilizations, extraterrestrial life, astrobiology, and super toast. I didn't read about that last thing since my grandfather ate super toast and exploded."

"…Oh. I'm sorry to hear that…"

"Don't worry about it; I didn't even like him. He used to throw hot soup at me every time he got upset."

"Um... should we go ahead and…?"

"Go on."

"Bonus question: Do you believe that Zim is an alien?"

"Yes, but isn't that kind of obvious?"

"Congratulations, Dani; you've passed." He said, turning off the flashlight.

"What did I pass?"

He slid off the table and sat next to me. "Didn't you read the note? I was testing you in order to see if you were capable of being my partner."

"What do you mean by that?"

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me to his side. "Just think of it, Dani. You and I, exposing Zim for the alien he is. Going on adventures, tracking ghosts down; finding Bigfoots, and other stuff; we'll be the best paranormal investigators ever!"

"I don't want to be a paranormal investigator when I grow up."

"Oh. Well, I'm sure that'll look good on your resume."

"You said that we would go on adventures, right?"

"Yes."

"That sounds pretty fun."

"All you have to do is agree to be my partner. So, what do you say?"

Adventures, ghosts, fame, _and_ adventures? It all sounds too good to be true! I could study all types of different species, travel to different places, and get all the pie I want!

Although, this seems a little too much for me to handle right now. I'm never the type of person to pass up an opportunity, but this could be dangerous.

Also, I just noticed that this kid still had his arm around me.

"Look, Dib, I'm flattered, and I want to be you partner, but don't you think that we should take things slow."

"What do you mean?"

"I just think that we should be friends instead of being partners right away."

"Oh, I get it. You're nervous. Don't worry, Dani. I'll bring you with me on the smaller investigations _before_ the big ones."

I sighed. "Could we just call ourselves 'friends' before we use the term 'partners'?"

He shrugged. "I can work with that. I'm glad that I could convince you with my well-written note."

"You mean the note that said ''Will you be my partner?'' with a square box next to each to each option? You wrote ''please' 'a bunch of times next to ''yes'', and a frowny face next to ''no''."

"Seriously? Do you _have_ to be so desperate?" The purple-haired girl says, getting up from the table and walking away.

"…"

"…."

"That's Gaz. She's my sister/sidekick."

"…Oh."


	3. Chapter 3

Yay! Another chapter (speaking to myself)! I decided that I should post this chapter a day before my birthday, instead of doing it tomorrow. I dunno :P… Enjoy!

Dani's POV:

"Doomy doomy doom, with the remainder of death. That will also be on your test."

What does that even mean? I know that I shouldn't try to question her, but why would something like that be on a test? Never mind, I guess. Looking on the bright side, I'm glad that I have a new friend. I start to tap my pen on the desk, humming a random tune that I had just made up.

"So, in conclusion, class- Dani!" "Hm?" I said, barely paying attention to her. "Pass these homework packets out since you're so happy." "Okay." I shrugged.

I took a bunch of packets from her desk and began giving them out. I asked everyone to take one for themselves and hand the other ones to someone behind them. Everyone seemed to cooperate, except…

"How dare you command Zim to do your bidding! Begone with you, human."

"All I asked was for you to do the same thing that _no one else_ had a problem with." I crossed my arms. "Why do we need to argue about this?"

"I said begone!" He yelled, pointing at me.

I stomped my foot. "You know what!?"

"Zim knows all!"

"Doomy doomy-"

"You're just a big jerk, you know that!?"

"How dare you question the knowledge of _**Zim**_!"

"Dani! Zim! Detention!"

I gasped. "D-detention!? Ms. Bitters, I can't have detention! This is my first day of school! Please give me another chance!" I begged.

"You should have thought of that before you started arguing."

"But I-"

"It's either that or punishment number 22. Pick one."

"Punishment number 22!? Ms. Bitters, isn't that the most brutal punishment?" Zita asked.

"Yes, and it was also the most effective. You have a choice, Dani."

"I think I'll just stay for detention."

I sat down at my desk.

Of course, I didn't know what 'punishment 22' was, but I wasn't going to find out the hard way. I rested my head on the palm of my hand, silently tapping my pen on the desk.

"Good choice, Dani you wouldn't have wanted punishment 22." Dib said.

"What _is _punishment 22?"

He cringed in fear. "No student has ever made it through punishment 22."

"Hey, that rhymes!"

"…"

"Sorry. Go ahead."

"The worst student to go through it with would be… Zim." He said, peering over at Zim.

"But what _is_-?"

The bell rang.

"Don't worry, Dani. I've got a plan to help you. You'll see."

"You're gonna convince Ms. Bitters to let me out of detention?"

"Even better."

He ran out of the classroom, along with the other students.

*Sigh*

*Tap* Tap*

Looking out of the window I could see Dib standing outside.

"How did you-"

"Just remember the plan, Dani. I've never let any of my partners down!"

"How many partners-"

"Dani, get back to your seat!"

"Yes, Ms. Bitters."

"Now, the two of you will complete your homework. Afterwards, you will sit here and be miserable!" She stood up, walking towards the door. "I have a couple of errands to run. If either of you try to escape, a herd of wild pigs will attack." With that, she left.

Why would this school hold wild animals captive just so they could release them whenever someone tries to escape?

I guess it's best not to ask.

I sat down at my desk, flipping through the packet. "Hey, this is easy! I could get this done in ten minutes!" I smiled.

"Ha! With your puny stature, I'd be surprised if you were done in an hour. This ''work'' would prove far too easy, even for a mere smeet."

"First of all, I'm only about… three inches shorter than you. Secondly, I don't see what my height has to do with my intelligence; and thirdly… what's a ''smeet''?"

"None of your business, pig girl." He spat.

I sighed. "Are you going to be like this for the rest of the school year?"

"Explain."

"Are you serious!? You were just being mean to me for no apparent reason! What did I ever do to you?"

He looked in the opposite direction, crossing his arms.

"…"

"…Never mind." I walked to the door. "I'm going out."

Zim's POV:

The door had slammed behind her.

"Whatever."

I would have completed the assignment given as ''homework'', but after skimming through the packet, I figured that the girl was right. Of course, being the great Invader that I am; I'm sure that I could find something to keep myself entertained in this room. I decided to examine the contents of the other students' desks, but to no avail. The only desks I hadn't searched yet were Willy's, Ms. Bitters', and Dani's.

I couldn't bring myself to willingly go near Willy's territory. An Invader, such as I, should not bother to soil his hands with such filth.

I suppose I should examine the pig girl's desk before doing the same with Ms. Bitters'.

I looked inside the cow human's desk.

"A single notepad; how pathetic. Although, she _does _carry that back attachment around most of the time. She might be keeping her items with her on her back at the time."

I took hold of the notepad and began reading the pages.

"This is incredibly idiotic. Why would she write down all of her thoughts and… _feelings_ in-"

'I wish I could have at least made friends with the green kid. It doesn't seem like he has any friends at all. I saw him in the cafeteria, picking at his food, and for some reason, I couldn't help but smile and watch. He reminded me that he was different with every single thing he did so far; and I was just the same. I probably couldn't put my finger on it, even if I tried, but something about him completely enthralls me.

….Maybe I should stop staring at him in class. Although I can't help it, it's weird, and it's not like myself to do so.'

"Stupid human girl! How dare she write this!?"

Reading that idiotic note had made the sides of my face increase in temperature, turning them into a bright green color.

Where is that pig girl, anyway?

Dani's POV:

Now that I was out of the classroom, I could finally explore the school. Even though I still wonder what Ms. Bitters is up to, I'm grateful that she isn't here. I had already seen most of the classrooms, and I've only been gone for about five minutes.

The bathrooms are pretty dirty, though.

"So, let's see… I've been to the principal's office, the gymnasium, the cafeteria, the nurse's office, and the bathrooms… unfortunately. Where else can I go?"

I should have brought my notepad with me.

"Wait a second… I left it in the classroom!"

How could I do something so stupid? I'm supposed to bring it with me at all times, no matter what! That's where I write all my ideas and thoughts! What if someone reads everything I wrote down?

I rushed to the classroom.

Normally, I wouldn't care so much if I had left it behind, just as long as no one was in the room with it. Even if a teacher was left with it, I wouldn't really mind, but this time, I left it with Zim. Who knows what he would do with it?

I knocked on the door.

"What?"

"Could you please open the door?" I asked.

"Do it yourself, human."

"How am I going to open a locked door?"

"Using a key, obviously."

I stomped my foot. "Well, I don't _have_ a key."

"Why do you feel the need to tell me this?"

"Because I can't get in unless you open the door!" I started to try and push it open.

I could hear him slam something shut.

As he opened the door, I fell to the ground, landing on my face.

"I never locked it, you cow!"

"…Oh." I stood up, dusting myself off. "You could've said that earlier, you know."

"_You_ shouldn't have assumed I locked it."

"I-… you're right… I guess."

He placed his hand on his chest and put that (in)famous smile on his face. The one that's drenched with smugness.

"Of course I am, pig monkey."

"I have to find my-"I gasped. "What happened to the room!?" Pencils and papers covered the floor; desks and chairs were turned over; and he had obviously picked the lock to Ms. Bitters' drawer.

"Ms. Bitters is gonna kill us when she gets back!"

"Correction: She will kill _you. I _will have escaped before she arrives." He opened the window. "So long, pig worm." He said, jumping outside.

Soon after, I heard a loud scream. He quickly leapt back inside, landing on his face. His clothes were ripped, and his hair had been tilted to the side, revealing something black underneath.

"Well, I see that you forgot about the pigs."

"Silence!" He said, fixing his… hair. "I have to find a way out of this."

"Hmm… maybe you should consider cleaning up the mess you made before she gets back?" I said sarcastically.

"I could come up with a better plan than that." He said, waving his hand.

"If I get in trouble because of you, _I'll_ destroy you myself!"

Zim ignored me as he tried to think of something else.

"Yes, yes; duly noted, human." He said, waving me off.

I growled. "I'm-"

I heard a loud screech and decided to look out the window. A black car was parked in the parking lot. I knew it had to be her.

"Ms. Bitters is here!"

"That's nonsense," Zim said, bumping me out of the way. "How can you be sure that is her?"

"The license plate says 'Doom'. We have to hurry!"

"I still don't think-"

She stepped out of the car, slamming the door shut.

He screamed.

"I have to think of a plan!"

"There's no time for that; just do what I do."

"I-"

"Unless you _want_ whatever punishment 22 is."

"_**Ffffine!**_" He said, folding his arms.

"Now, all you have to do is-"

Ms. Bitter's POV:

I wonder if those two pathetic, hopeless children have caused any damage.

I opened the door.

I was surprised to see that, for once, the room had been completely clean. Dani was sitting in her chair, doing homework, while Zim sat, tapping his pencil on his desk. His eyes were wide, darting from left to right.

"Well, it seems like you two have learned your lesson."

"Oh, Ms. Bitters! I didn't see you there. I was too busy… being miserable." Dani smiled.

Zim's POV:

She had a look of suspicion on her face, raising her eyebrow.

"Is everything alright, ma'am?"

She started sniffing the room. "Something smells… different."

I knew this wouldn't work! I should have never listened to that pig.

"I-!"

"I'm so glad you noticed the air freshener I used!"

"So, that was _you_?"

"Don't you just _love_ the beautiful aroma of strawberry mint?"

"I'd rather inhale the natural odor of misery that filled the room."

"I'll keep that in mind the next time I clean for my own enjoyment." She said in a pleasant tone, rapidly blinking her eyes.

"You two are dismissed,"

"Thank you, ma'-"

"But the next time, your punishment won't be so merciful."

"Yes, ma'am; is there anything else I could do for you?"

Ms. Bitters growled. "Get out of my sight, child!"

"Of course." She said as we exited the classroom, closing the door.

"How did you do that?" I asked.

"What?"

"You completely cleared her suspicions with ease, just by blinking all… weird. How can you do that?" If I found out how to manipulate the humans, I could make them do…stuff. The stuff that will help me destroy them!

"Oh, that's easy. You just have to suck up to her and flutter your eyes like a cutie pie. I'm sure you can-… never mind."

"Hm?"

"Say, what _was_ that smell?"

"What were you about to-"

"Aren't you glad to be out of that classroom? I'm going to go outside." She said, running out of the main entrance.

I went after her.

"How dare you change the subject of which Zim is speaking of!?"

As I left the Skool, I noticed something… unsettling.

"Thank the stars; it's raining!"

It was raining! Normally, the rain wouldn't be a problem, but I had just run out of paste yesterday. Gir had gotten into my supply and began eating it. That terrible robot!

I growled, holding on to the stair column. "The stars had nothing to do with this!"

"That's just an expression, Zim."

"Yes, of course." I rolled my eyes.

"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow, then."

She pulled a rain shield out of her holding bag.

"Wait!"

"What is it?"

"Which way do you walk?"

"Uh… that way." The human pointed in the direction that I was supposed to go. "Why?

"N…Nothing."

"O…kay?" She started to walk down the steps.

"Wait!" I pulled her arm.

"What is it!?"

I couldn't bear to ask a pitiful human for help, even if I _was_ in extreme danger. It's disgusting.

"Never mind."

"I'll see you later, then."

"Wait!"

"What is it, Zim!?"

Although, it _is_ extremely degrading to ask for the help of an inferior human, I'll only need her shield until I get to my base.

"Nothing."

She exhaled. "Look, it's obvious that you want something from me, but I can't help you unless you tell me what it is."

"…"

"You'll just have to ask tomorrow, then. I'm already late getting home."

"Wait!"

"For the last time, what do you want!?"

"I… require your temporary assistance."

"O…kay? What do you want?"

"I… need to walk…with you."

"Why?"

"The rain; It feels like acid on my skin… It's only because of my… skin condition."

"So, you need the pig girl's help, huh?" She mocked.

"Just this _once_, human."

"…"

"Well!?"

"Wait a second; I'm thinking."

I growled.

"…You said the rain feels like acid, right?"

"…Correct."

"Well," She walked up the stairs and stood next to me. "I couldn't let you go through that."

"What do you mean?"

"'_I mean_' that you can come with me. Grab the handle and I'll walk you home. You _do_ live around here, right?"

"Affirmative."

"Then I'm sure it's no trouble. Let's go before it gets any later."

I held on to the shield.

"Remember, human; this is only temporary. I will have my own shield the next time it rains."

"Whatever you say, Zim."

The pig girl and I walked down the steps.

"So… what's your opinion on pie?" She asked.

"…What?"

"See, it's like this…"

Dib's POV:

"Are you sure you're not coming, Gaz?"

"Positive."

I grabbed my camera, along with a couple of water balloons, stuffing them inside my bag.

"Tell dad I'll be late."

"Whatever. Just shut the door when you leave out."

"Are you sure you're not-?"

She threw the remote down and glared at me. "Yes, I'm sure, Dib. Now, will you go away so I can watch TV?"

"So, you don't want to watch my plan to save the Earth?"

"No, I don't want to watch you fail right now. If you don't go away, I'll be forced to beat you into a big-headed pulp."

"…"

"Okay, bye!" I ran out the door.

I walked to the school, cleverly sneaking behind the bushes so that I wouldn't be seen. My partner has probably stalled Zim long enough for my plan to work. I'm going to expose that alien, once and for all this time!

….Probably.

Oh well; it wouldn't hurt to try.

Before crossing the street, I waited for the cross-screen-thingy to turn green. It was almost time for my dad to leave work, so I had to hurry and find Zim.

"That was the most _**horrifying**_ thing I've ever heard! …I kind of liked it!"

I could tell that it was Zim's voice. I jumped in the bushes before being noticed.

"There's another one where this guy gets trapped in a meat grinder with a sheep… "

As they came closer, their voices were getting louder. After a while, they had crossed the street.

"And then, it exploded into bear chunks. The end!"

"Ah ha ha-! Wait, how did _that _happen?" 

It was now or never.

"I've got you now, Zim!"

I jumped out of the bushed and reached for my water balloons, quickly throwing them in Zim's direction.

"Ha! Take that, you-!"

"DIIIIB!"

Oops.

The green goblin had hidden behind Dani, using her as a human shield.

"Heh… lucky I didn't use hot sauce like I originally planned, right?" I said nervously.

"Who the heck plays with water balloons in the rain!?"

"I wasn't playing with them; I was doing work!"

"Do you _**know **_how long it takes for me to dry my hair!? My mother will kill me because of my clothes!"

"It'll only take thirty minutes to dry off. You're acting like I used toilet water." I crossed my arms. Who knew that a girl would get _this_ angry? I had thrown three of them at her.

"_**Did you**_!?"

"Um… maybe?" I wasn't sure if I had used toilet water or the dishwater from the sink. Either way, I had planned on hitting Zim with them.

She growled, walking towards me.

Zim's POV:

*SLAP*

The human pig had used her hand in order to communicate with the Dib-stink's face.

Afterwards, she grabbed the rain-shield and prepared to walk away.

I laughed. "You stupid Dib-rat; I could have seen your plan from a mile away! In fact, I did!"

The monkey-boy stood up, holding his face. "Laugh now, Zim; but one day, I'll expose you!"

…

"I _am_ laughing. Ha ha ha ha!"

"Are you coming or not, Zim? I'm not in the mood."

"Hold on a second." I pointed at the Dib. "Ha! Okay, I'm done."

Dani's POV:

My hair is wet, my clothes are drenched, and I'm late. There's no way my mother wouldn't kill me. If I could hurry and sneak past her, she would probably think she didn't notice me walking in earlier… I don't know.

Zim was still snickering about the incident.

I sighed. This is no way to start a school year.

"Hm? Why aren't _you _laughing?"

"Well, other than the fact that my hair and clothes are wet, my mother is going to kill me for practically everything that happened today." I sighed. "Don't you ever get terrified of your mother?"

"Is that how normal human worms feel about their filthy parents?"

"I dunno; that's why I asked you."

…

"Master, you're back!"

A small green dog came to hug Zim; wrapping its small green arms around his waist.

"Aww, he's so cute!" I realized something and decided to step back. "He doesn't bite, doesn't he?"

"Uh… yes! He does! In fact, his bites are ten times more poisonous than the other Earth dogs."

"No, I don't!" The green puppy said.

"Silence!"

"Um…" This was a little awkward.

"Take me to the house, Gir. The rain has cleared up enough for me to walk."

"It's across the street!"

"Gir! Do not question Zim!"

"Okay!"

"Goodbye, human. Your assistance was satisfactory, but I no longer require your help. I expect your presence in school tomorrow, but if not, that is fine, as well."

"Uh… Bye, I guess…"

"Gir! Assist me!"

"Okay!"

As the dog dragged Zim across the street, I looked at the green house that was supposedly his. It was a strange-looking house with little garden gnomes, a pink flamingo, and a sign that said 'I LOVE EARTH' (he must've bought it on Earth Day), among other unusual decorations.

"Hmm…"

I started to make my way home. If I was going to make up an excuse, I needed to think of one as quickly as possible.

That shouldn't be too hard.

This chapter took a while, but I'm glad I wrote it 'n stuff. I hope you liked it! If you have any advice to give me, please (kindly) let me know. Thanks!


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